1. Clemson is better than Arkansas. And it's time for Willy Korn to get some serious minutes. I'm not calling for a complete benching of Harper, but he clearly isn't the same quarterback he was last year. He threw 2 terrible picks yesterday, and probably should have thrown 2 more. He can't throw downfield. He telegraphs his passes. He has ZERO pocket presence. He looks injured. He makes excuses and points to his statistics against terrible opponents when asked about his performance. Frankly, he looked downright bad against the worst team on our schedule(outside of South Carolina). I don't believe he is capable of leading this team to a division, or conference, title. I couldn't glean anything from this game in the positive sense. It was a 1-AA team. Clemson gets its first chance to prove something, anything, next Saturday against Maryland.
2. South Carolina's offense may be the worst in all of 1-A football. It is somewhat understandable to struggle against the Wofford option attack, but it is utterly unfathomable to only put up 16 real points(most coming from field goals), and to have to go for it on 4th down in your own territory to win the game. Look for Garcia real soon next week against UAB. Look for Spurrier to quit real soon at the end of the year. I stand by my prediction of 3-9 on the season.
3. Les Miles has a pair of 8 ton testicles. I keep waiting for one of his coaching moves to bite him in the hat, but it just never happens. In a way it's frustrating, b/c you know he shouldn't be getting away with all this stuff, but he just continues to prove me wrong. Hats off(just kidding, Les) to his enourmous nuts.
4. When Wake Forest vaulted into the top 25 and challenged for the ACC two years ago, it was because the ACC was incredibly weak. Now that Vanderbilt is doing the same thing 2 years later, it's because the SEC is sooooooooooooooo awesome. SEC! SEC! SEC! SEC! SEC!
5. SEC! SEC! SEC! SEC! SEC!
6. The Pac-10 is the worst BCS conference in America.
7. The Big 12 is the best.
8. That impending sense of doom that all ACC defensive coordinators are feeling? That's just Paul Johnson and his virtually unstoppable offense..............in its first year. It's time to be afraid. GT might not take the division this year, but IMO, it's only a matter of time before they do it thoroughly and often. If they can continue to get good defensive talent, the Jackets will emerge as a national power over the next decade.
9. Something is terribly wrong in Knoxville. The Vols returned an All-SEC caliber running back behind a superb offensive line, and they just can't move the ball. Worse yet, they seem hellbent on shooting themselves in the foot every chance they get. I'm not a Tennessee fan or a Florida hater, but that game yesterday pissed me off. When will enough of Fulmer be enough?
10. Florida St. is not back, and the Noles went out of their way last night to prove it. Their defense will be stout for the remainder of the year, as they get 5 starters back from suspension starting next weekend. But the same offensive problems that have plagued them for the past 4 years are still there. If you are puzzled by the lack of quarterback talent in Columbia, SC, look further south to Tallahassee for a real head scratcher. We're still a couple of years away from seeing anything resembling the old FSU. Now Miami, that's another story altogether.
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51 comments:
I've read a lot of blogs in my day; hell i've even written some and been the webmaster for a few others. So this is not an uninformed comment when I say this is easily the worst blog on the internet. This literary refuse belongs on a bathroom wall somewhere and then that bathroom needs to be torn down. Keep sucking whoever you are.
Thanks. Keep reading whoever you are.
Ebeneazer, would you be gracious enough to link some of the blogs you have written, that I may learn from the best?
I dunno what's funnier...his actual comment or his name.
All your comments are true. Quick comment on Harper. What do you think his problem is? The only thing that comes to my mind is his shoulder, but he has preached to everyone countless times that it's fine. Who knows...maybe you do. I don't.
"When will enough of Fulmer be enough?"
When he eats too much at his local Golden Corral Buffet.
Seriously. They'll never fire him, and he'll NEVER quit. It'll have to be health reasons that take him out of the game. Same goes for Mark Mangino, except he's actually a very good coach for a good football team.
I don't know what Harper's problem is, but I do not believe him when he says his shoulder is fine. His throwing motion is much different this year, and it appears to be b/c he's compensating.
"Les Miles has a pair of 8 ton testicles."
Hahahaha
Submitted to StumbleUpon for that.
Normally I would say crawl before you walk, but it's obvious you probably do your fair share of crawling to your computer in whatever substance induced stupor you achieve prior to posting your drivel. I recommend this link as a good starting point http://teacherpattiw.blogspot.com/... And yeah, yeah, make fun of the name, I've heard it all before...Good luck on trying to improve your blog...but I suspect the kid from Mask has a better chance and winning world's smallest face than you do of rehabilitating this virtual cesspool.
Just an outsider's objective observation...
Owner's blog is definately better than that self-serving nonsense you linked us to Neazie.
Thanks, Ebeneazer. I'll check it out. One more thing, if you'll just indulge me, who is your team, and how did you find my blog? Thanks again for reading. And I appreciate the constructive criticism.
I'm confused. Are you Patti? If so, it would be helpful if you described what you "at" once you clear off some room on your desk.
Well Ghost, I'm glad you decided to take time out of your busy day of building model airplanes in your foster parents' attic to chime in with your thoughts. Now get back to constructing the fuselage of your B-52 bomber... As to your opinion of this blog, whereas it has been stated that the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making the world believe he didn't exist... I firmly believe his biggest trick was supplying 'Owner' with a computer so he could irreparably infect the minds of the three people who read this septic dreck. I suggest if 'Owner' spent as much time trying to get a girlfriend as he does spewing meaningless insights and painting his face to resemble Sting at a WCW no-holds barred catfight match, his quality of life would improve immensely. It would have been more symbolic if he had painted those cat paws in his mouth to represent how much he gags on his own foot due to the many literary and libelous faux pas' he disseminates on this frivolous site. But continue on 'Owner', maybe one day we can meet at the State Fair at whatever booth you will inevitably be working.
Neazie, what are you compensating for??? Your invectiveness and venom is truly one-of-a-kind. Much like that 2-incher in your pants you probably troll around with.
I'm married, Ebeneazer. And you still haven't told me your favorite team. Is there a reason you're withholding this information?
Ah...fuselage finished I see...congrats
I think the "VT" fan might have some competition.
Much to your chagrin, I am a Clemson fan and your attempts to chum the waters of the rivalry with your poor man's talk soup approach is neither witty nor novel. Whereas you and your questionably loyal readers undoubtedly feel this is a humorous approach it is in actuality a black eye for the Clemson fan base. You couldn't sense humor if it came over to your house, introduced itself and then hit you in the head with a bat. Leave the comedic quips to those capable of enticing another human being to laugh rather than making arbitrary comments which only result in others laughing at the writer's foibles and contemplating which genes exactly are the ones which are retarding his DNA.
Far be it from me to call you a liar.
Owner, I'm still a bit confused as to why you think it's farfetched for me to be a VT fan. If I was going to fake a fanbase don't you think I would have picked Southern Cal...Ohio State..Georgia...Missouri...Oklahoma..etc? I mean hell, James claims he's a Gator fan living in Columbia. Has anyone busted his balls about it yet? Seriously.
And yes, this Bleezer bitch is annoying. Not because she rivals me. I pick fun at you and Clemson for laughs, and we all enjoy it. She's just being a dumb bitch with a messy desk. Not cool, Patti. Not cool.
VT fan, I don't believe you are a VT fan b/c you claim to live in Virginia, yet you are highly opinionated on both Clemson and South Carolina, you quote things from tigernet, and you have even discussed things you heard on 104.9, an upstate South Carolina radio station.
James isn't suspect because he doesn't go on 10,000 word diatribes against Clemson or SCAR. He doesn't do so b/c there is no real bias against either. He's just matter of fact. You, on the other hand, are certifiable. It just doesn't make sense for a VT fan to be so "involved."
That said, I do not want to discourage you from continuing to post your thoughts here. You are an important part of this blog, and most of us enjoy reading what you have to say. Ebeneazer is just kind of annoying and pointless.
Far be it from you to be clever or interesting...fellow blogospherians, please tell Gilbert Arenas and Curt Schilling that the Cat-faced Gremlin is on the verge of stealing their readers...long live this poorly conceived blog as a verifiable clinic on how to screw up publicly.
Ebeneazer, how long have you been reading my blog?
Maybe you mental midgets can't understand that I am not associated with that blog...it is just an example of how a 2nd grade teacher that hangs out with cats and dogs can produce a better blog than the one before you...As for the VT fan, many fear what they can't understand, so you obviously are deathly afraid of anyone with over a 75 word vocabulary and equally afraid that "Beamer Ball" is nearly becoming synonomous with "Effective Ways To Squander Tidewater Talent". And 'V', please take an in-depth look at why you actually even went to that blog, I think your time would be better spent reading the remaining Narnia books on your Bucket List, rather than concerning yourself with my comments to 'Owner'.
Ebeneazer, I asked you to provide a link to one of YOUR blogs, not some random 2nd grade teacher's. It's probably time for you to put up or shut up. Quasi-witty metaphors and baseless assumptions can only take you so far.
I'm also a little confused as to why you said, "And yeah, yeah, make fun of the name....I've heard it all before." If that's not your blog, what have you heard all before.
I will gladly direct you to one of my blogs if you will identify which of my comments has been a "baseless assumption", if that can even exist...
May I suggest a Battle of the Blogs
Okay, I'll start your comment that I needed to try and get a girlfriend. You assumed I was single, when in fact I am married. Your assumption there was baseless, or, without base.
Now, please provide a link to one of your blogs.
Let me know if you me to explain what a baseless assumption is, Ebeneazer.
I think Philip has it right here. Let's have a Blog Bowl. Everyone can read and then vote. Who's in?
May I suggest 'Philip', you shut down your computer and retire to your holding cell while pondering whether there was a consonant shortage on the day you were born or if your parents sought the advice of Antawn Jamison's mother when determining how to spell Philip on your birth certificate
Ebeneazer, we're all waiting for a link to your Super-Blog. If you aren't going to provide one, we're all probably going to start ignoring you because you aren't offering anything substantive or interesting.
Actually, that last comment was pretty funny. But still, we need a link.
Now, now, 'Owner', I based the assumption that you didn't have a girlfriend on the fact that no woman would voluntarily remain with a face-painting greg kinnear hack; Now that you explained you have trapped one with the legal restraints of marriage, presumably before you initiated this blog, her ability to head for the hills has been compromised. This is in no way a slight on her; As I am sure she is definitely the better half and hopefully she will be able to assist in your recovery as a habitual punchline.
Perhaps I should have said ignorant assumptions instead. Nevertheless, we're still waiting.
I've got another one for you, EB. On what basis did you formulate your opinion that "ghost" builds model airplanes in his parents' attic?
Ok, Ok, I can tell I'm not wanted here...I've got a good feeling you won't hear from me ever again, so I'll leave you with this:
I am Ebenezer Bleezer,
I run BLEEZER'S ICE CREAM STORE,
there are flavors in my freezer
you have never seen before,
twenty-eight divine creations
too delicious to resist,
why not do yourself a favor,
try the flavors on my list:
COCOA MOCHA MACARONI
TAPIOCA SMOKED BALONEY
CHECKERBERRY CHEDDAR CHEW
CHICKEN CHERRY HONEYDEW
TUTTI-FRUTTI STEWED TOMATO
TUNA TACO BAKED POTATO
LOBSTER LITCHI LIMA BEAN
MOZZARELLA MANGOSTEEN
ALMOND HAM MERINGUE SALAMI
YAM ANCHOVY PRUNE PASTRAMI
SASSAFRAS SOUVLAKI HASH
SUKIYAKI SUCCOTASH
BUTTER BRICKLE PEPPER PICKLE
POMEGRANATE PUMPERNICKEL
PEACH PIMENTO PIZZA PLUM
PEANUT PUMPKIN BUBBLEGUM
BROCCOLI BANANA BLUSTER
CHOCOLATE CHOP SUEY CLUSTER
AVOCADO BRUSSELS SPROUT
PERIWINKLE SAUERKRAUT
COTTON CANDY CARROT CUSTARD
CAULIFLOWER COLA MUSTARD
ONION DUMPLING DOUBLE DIP
TURNIP TRUFFLE TRIPLE FLIP
GARLIC GUMBO GRAVY GUAVA
LENTIL LEMON LIVER LAVA
ORANGE OLIVE BAGEL BEET
WATERMELON WAFFLE WHEAT
I am Ebenezer Bleezer,
I run BLEEZER'S ICE CREAM STORE,
taste a flavor from my freezer,
you will surely ask for more.
...And Poof, he was gone...
You've got it all wrong. You are wanted here. My readers love comedy, be it intentional or not.
Just try backing up your bloviations with substance.
And FYI, you spell your own name incorrectly. Remember that suggestion about learning to crawl before you walk?
Bleezer, dude...stick around. Enjoy yourself.
oh snap! Bleezer just go served! keep up the good work, Owner. punish this lilliputian.
EB,
Worst waste of time I have ever seen.... go get yourself some fried peanuts and go back to Blue Ridge and sucking Will Merritt's doorstop.
what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Yeah-that goes for all you turkeys.
I award Jackass with internet 500 points for the Billy Madison reference.
Spot on, dude, spot on.
New season of Heroes starts tonight. Hells Bellz Yeah!
Bleazer,
That was the probably the most fagged out thing that I've ever seen on a football-devoted blog.
My suggestion:
Start at the top and go back through the posts that brought you to fagdom, stopping right before your decision to initiate such faggery. Ask yourself why. Then, read that gay ass poem that you probably ripped off, and ask yourself if that was really the best decision. I would suggest that it was not.
Ever been to a football game at TL Hanna and seen Radio at halftime playing football against his pretend opponent? You are the (gay) Radio of local community theater.
Bleezer....
*Fwap fwap fwap fwap fwap fwap*
Keep it up, dude. And stick around for the party.
What the hell is "ice crem?"
Heroes is a good show though.
By 'Ice Cream Store' I think EB means a Comic Book store.
I think comic book store is french for failure.
I think comic book store is french for failure.
Or so I've heard.
Can anyone clarify that for me?
excellent points and the details are more precise than elsewhere, thanks.
- Joe
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