Wednesday, August 27, 2008

I'ma Get Me Some Swa

Well, folks, the cat is out of the bag. After a puzzling decision came down Monday to start 3rd string(white) tailback Taylor Rank, Steve Spurrier knew he would face a barrage of questions from media and fans alike. Why are we starting a white tailback? How can we win with a cracker tailback? I didn't even know we had a honkey tailback? And so forth. And true to form, the questions came, albeit not quite as bluntly. When asked yesterday if starter Mike Davis was sitting for disciplinary reasons, Spurrer said, ""No, no, I'm not unhappy with Mike's effort. He'll be fine." Spurrier also cited his lack of practice[due to injury] in fall camp as another reason for the move. To the lay person these explanations held water. But being the intrepid reporter I claim to be, I decided to dig a little further into the situation, and what I found should be of grave concern to all gamecock fans.

Mike Davis is not missing the start tomorrow night for any of the reasons(excuses) given by Coach Cock 'n Balls. He is missing the start, in essence, because he was thirsty. *So thirsty was Davis that he felt the need to break into a refrigerator in the team's training facility. And not only are we talking about theft here, theft from his own school, we are talking about serious appliance damage. Once the crime was discovered, the players were called to a meeting, and the guilty party was asked to step forward. Davis chose to remain silent, adding a 3rd blow to the crime spree that left, perhaps, one teammate drinkless. Only later, through the facility's video surveillance system, did the coaching staff learn the true identity of the criminal in their midst. It looks like some things just haven't changed in Columbia.

One thing that has changed, however, is Coach Spurrier's reputation as a straight shooter. When he was at Florida, SOS was as honest as they came, sometimes to a fault. But now, faced with embarassment after embarassment, it seems that the Ol Ball Coach is just resigned to taking the easy way out. And it isn't surprising to this blogger either. If you had to answer questions on a daily basis about the south carolina university football team, you'd probably find it easier just to lie too. Hell, what do you expect from a program that feels it has to put locks on refrigerators?

Now I know this isn't the most egregious of crimes to take place within the gamecock football program, but it just seems like you can't open up the newspaper these days without reading about some coot breaking the law. At least it's a far cry from the Holtz days, when players helped themselved to computers and video equipment. But a crime is a crime, and Davis has to take his punishment. Speaking of which, it'll be interesting to see how long he sits out. Spurrier is notorious for his non-punishments down in Columbia. My guess is, after a few lame series Thursday night, Spurrier will realize that the real crime is whitey toting the rock.

*link to article: http://www.charleston.net/news/2008/aug/27/davis_not_starting_disciplinary_reasons52100/


Now, let's enjoy some Wednesday MOAG.

On the Davis incident:

- And to think this made the paper.....Wouldn't have at any other school! I certainly hope we're getting this kind of publicity when we win games this year.

- This is like breaking a window to get into your own house when you've been locked out.

- I swear if I was Steve Spurrier I would find out who leaked this story and he/she would be out of a job. Every D1 college in the country provides sports drinks for the athletes before/during/after work outs. Who's the idiot who put a lock on the refrigerator? That's who needs to sit out and pay for the damages to the door.

- Too many people run their mouths up there. The man was obviously thirsty, let him and whomever else have a drink whenever they want one!

- The only purpose for this story is to make Mike Davis look like a bad apple, disrupt our team's preparation prior to kickoff, tarnish USC football team's already damaged image, make SOS look like he is dishonest with the public.

- the guy who locked it should be fired. imo.

On Clemson's schedule:

- Wake forest is a tougher team than bama or us? that's a big load

- make no mistake, we should be the toughest game on their schedule and quite possibly, there only loss.

- If they played USC's schedule they would be preseason 4th in the SEC just like us.

- If we had their JV schedule, we would win them all too.

- Im willing to bet when USC starts hammering the Taters 8 out of 10 games they will drop us.

On this year:

- we go 9-4 this year, I honestly don't think we look back.

On next year:

- I'm thinking Next Year is the year we take the East.

- 2009, especially 2010, will be more like a special year.

On a 2008 Team Slogan:

- "Make no mistake, it's not revenge they're after. It's the reckonin'." -Doc Holiday

- "Be Perfect, In assignments, ethusiasm, and effort."

- "We're comin, and HELL'S comin with us!"

- "The talk is over The walk has begun"

- "This is Next Year"

Some more NC State predictions:

- USC: 45, NCST: 10

- 41-0 and I'm trying to be conservative

- 45-10, if they make it to 10.

- This one's easy: 42 - 10

- 38-3 USC Spurrier is ready to put his stamp on this program. The defense is ready to kill and NCS just happens to be first up.

- 51-6 Carolina rolls overwhelmed pack

- 42 - nada COCKS!! WIN!!

- At least 50 for us , I have waited for a long time for us to hang 50 on somebody .

- Cocks win 42-10

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I mean it's not like Davis beat up his girlfriend and is still able to play tomorrow. Which is funny, because Mcslapabitch is still running buck wild in Clemson almost 70 days after the incident. Funny how things work. I'm sure all the Clemsux fans will sit back and sigh as Bowden casts down the dreaded "FIRST HALF SUSPENSION" five minutes before the game starts.

Can't go a day without hearing some dumbass incident with one of the Clemsux coaches or about McDaniel going buck nasty in Clemson.

Damn.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm..this sounds a bit too familiar. Oh yes, my Clemson buddies should be able to recall this.

Sounds similar to The Fridge and his cohort at NG who broke into the snack machine at the hotel where Clemtech was staying after the Orange Bowl, only they ate the whole machine's supply of food.


Thanks for playing.

Anonymous said...

Clemson fans only hear what they want to hear, Dave. In the mean time, they'll continue to embarass themselves with comments such as:

"Spurrier and Davis should be arrested because Davis "stole" a sports drink...a sports drink that belonged to THE PLAYERS."

"Suspend Davis for the SEASON or "x" amount of games."

I could go on, but they'll embarass themself some more in a couple days.

Unknown said...

Mark Mangino, are you the Virginia Tech fan?

Anonymous said...

Dude-
Really nice title-
Made me laugh out loud-
But then again, so does Sinbad. Damn. Its true, though.

Anonymous said...

Virginia Tech fan? No. I'm the coach for the Kansas Jayhawks, dumbass. I'm not a fan of any other team.

It is a funny title. Made me crack a grin. Then again so do All-You-Can-Eat buffets.

Anonymous said...

I think the biggest difference in the alleged Mcdaniel Incident and "ThirstGate" is that Mcdaniel's alleged incident was a victimless crime. Like you pointed out with "Thirstgate", at least one of his teamates was left parched, unable to fully quench his thirst in the muggy Columbia summer heat. Being a doctor I know that dehydration causes many more deaths than alleged minor contusions and abrasions

Unknown said...

That's a good point, Philip. Thanks for bringing a medical perspective to this issue.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, at least Mcslapabitch didn't leave someone on the ground dying of thirst. He probably knocked her down a few pegs and offered her some gatorade before taking off. Davis is just a cruel, cruel human being for what he did.