Monday, August 25, 2008

What Up, Dickbags?

Folks, game week is upon us. We've been waiting 8 long months for this. And now the state of South Carolina is front and center on the college football stage. The Gamecocks will kick off the season on Thursday, and the Tigers will get the ball rolling on Saturday. It's been many years since both teams, and their fans, began a season with such high expectations. Can the Tigers finally go 12-0? Can the gamecocks finally go 8-4? We won't know for certain after this weekend, but we'll have a pretty good idea how realistic those expecations are. Speaking of realistic expectations, it looks like the gamecocks will be starting a white running back against NC State. I'll let you draw your own conclusions. One thing is for certain though, the MOAG is expected to be at an all time high in 2008, and I will be right here serving it up. Seriously, he's white.

Now, before it's too late, I owe you an ACC Atlantic preview.

Predicted Order of Finish:

1. Clemson
2. Wake Forest
3. Boston College
4. Florida State
5. Maryland
6. NC State

1. Clemson - There is really nothing I can say that you haven't already seen or heard about this bunch. There is a lot of talent and experience coming back on both sides of the ball, especially at the skill positions. The biggest area of concern is along the offensive line, where the Tigers only return 2 starters from last year's Peach Bowl team. But the experience cupboard isn't bare, and what they lack in starts, they will more than make up with a toughness not seen in a Clemson O-Line for many, many years. Harper, Spiller, Davis, and Kelly will all have big years. One thing to watch for is a notably missing dynamic from recent Clemson teams: short yardage prowess. True freshman Jamie Harper can absolutely move a pile. On defense, the Tigers have the best defensive line in the league, and probably the deepest. The secondary is also loaded with talent and experience. I expect them to rank in the top 10 again in passing defense this year. Linebacker is the biggest question on this side of the ball. And much like the OL, there is talent, just not a lot of experience. One name to look for is true freshman Stanley Hunter. I think he will be the next great Tiger linebacker. Clemson's schedule is very favorable, although there is a moderately tough stretch from mid-October to mid-December, when the Tigers face Wake, BC, and FSU on the road. Nevertheless, this team will finally get over the hump and punch its ticket to the ACC Championship game.
Season Outlook: 11-1

2. Wake Forest - This team could pose a pretty serious threat to Clemson. They have the best coach in America in Jim Grobe. They also have potential stars at quarterback(Riley Skinner) and running back(Josh Adams). The WRs are unproven, but Grobe says it is his most talented bunch yet. Wake will always be salty on defense, and they return 9 starters, including All-America candidate, Alphonso Smith. I'm picking Clemson to win this division, but I would not be at all surprised if the Deacs put the kaibosh on that predictions. I'd be so pissed.
Season Outlook: 9-3

3. Boston College - Yes, BC lost just about every offensive threat to graduation. Yes, there is no more Matty Ice, with his stupid haircut. But this is BC we're talking about here. You know they are going to be good upfront on both sides of the ball. They just reload with future NFLers on the offensive line every year. The problem is, nobody really knows who they'll be blocking for. The qb position is still up for grabs, and they are paper thin at running back. On defense, I expect them to be one of the better units in the conference. They return most of their tuff front 7, and even better news is that Brian Toal is back. The bottom line is they won't be great, but anyone who overlooks the Eagles this year is in for a rude awakening.
Season Outlook: 8-4

4. Florida State - Despite what most pundits would have you believe, the Noles are simply not on the way back up. Their offensive line is downright putrid, as is their quarterback. Preston Parker could be a weapon but he doesn't play hard and is always in and out of trouble. They do have athletes on defense, but they aren't deep enough to hang with the better teams on their schedule. Even worse, there is the looming threat of an NCAA beatdown as a result of last year's cheating scandal. If that happens sooner rather than later, the Noles might be in for their worst season ever under Bobby Bowden. Things could fall apart quickly and somethin fierce.
Season Outlook: 7-5

5. Maryland - Ralph Friedgen is fat. Terp fans are scum.
Season Outlook: 7-5

6. NC State - This prediction was really by default more than anything, as I do think the Pack could be improved. They'll have to settle on a quarterback, but they do have a good stable of running backs. I won't pretend to know anything about their offensive line, but if there is one thing Tom O'Brien is good at, it's getting solid play out of his trench-men. I expect the Wolfpack to be a very fundamentally sound team, which would be a welcome change from the Chuck Dee'Amato days. Defense is young and unkown. They will probably give up a lot of points, but not to South Carolina.
Season Outlook: 5-7

Clemson will win the Atlantic division as well as the ACC, earning its first BCS Bowl bid in team history. Yay!

Now for some delicious MOAG

On Stephen Garcia:

- he's doing as good as korn is.

On starting white running back, Taylor Rank:

- when Rank gains 185 yards...how will you feel?

- It's win-win.

- Anyone remember John Riggens, Larry Csonka, Mike Alstott, Jerome Bettis? No blazing 40 times there either.

- he is the only Gamecock on the roster that has gained over 100 yards in every game he started!

*editor's note - He has started 1 game, against Florida Atlantic.

On season expectations:

- I won’t complain with anything above 8-4

- I'm thinking at least 8-4 with a minmum Peach Bowl birth and we could consider a 9-4 season a success.

- I think we should all be planning on 9 wins, and the season should be judged as a success or failure based on that number (although I'd be willing to accept 8).

- You can write it down,Gamecocks will beat fla.at fla.Iwill wait till the game before i give you my reasons because i do not want to disrupt their thought process now.

NC State predictions:

- Gamecocks 37, Wolfpack 10

- I'll be SHOCKED if we don't CRUSH NC State...

- I think we will CRUSH NC State and they will quickly see that what we prepare and face every year in the SEC makes some of these ACC games a joke.

- You guys need to get out of the past. Our offense scores 4 td's, our defense 1, and and 2 field goals. Final score: 41-6. NCSU won't play a defense like ours all year.

- If we don't win by at least 21 points then I say we are in for a long year.

- 45-6 Good Guys

- I think USC 45 Wolfpack 17

- 38-13, Carolina.


18 comments:

David Beckham said...

Wake will win the Atlantic. Grobe will get the most out of his players, Tommy will not.

Unknown said...

Lately Grobe has gotten the most out of out players too. But that is the one game that worries me the most this year.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Unknown said...

I wasn't including you.

Anonymous said...

Were you including me? Were you including diabeedus?

Unknown said...

diabeetus

Anonymous said...

"I'm picking Clemson to win this division, but I would not be at all surprised if the Deacs put the kaibosh on that predictions. I'd be so pissed."

I bet you would, dickbag. Bank on it happening. That and losing more games you aren't suppose to lose. I mean if you don't at least go to the ACCCG there should be an investigation at Clemson. Oh, and not to sell your o-line short, but why is it that every Clemson fan is eating up every word the coaching staff throws out? Nastiest Clemson has ever seen? Stop joking around and actually wait to see such a bold statement on the field. Spin the linebacker and o-line situation all you want, we'll see where all the hype and talk gets you this season. Good luck not choking this season, dickbags.

Dude, I love the Estevez brothers. John Hughes kicks so much ass.

Unknown said...

why don't you just stick with one name?

Anonymous said...

Why do you hate white people?

Some things are just better left unanswered.

Anonymous said...

I'm also under the impression that you're a black guy with a grudge against us white folk. It might have something to do with those damn white Tennessee players and that white runningback at Carolina. Just a hunch.

Racist blogger.

Unknown said...

What makes you think I hate white people? I just recognize our athletic shortcomings.

Anonymous said...

Athletic shortcomings? And this has to do with white people how? Nice try, Hitler.

In other news, your joke of a coach, Vick Koenning, needs to learn how to bite his tounge..along with that joke of a HC Tommy Bowden. It was funny reading the story and how he tried to play it like it was a joke. Now the whole state of Alabama thinks he's a joke, just like everyone else. Way to kill everything.

Unknown said...

What's a tounge?

Anonymous said...

Practice report: Koenning knocks 'Bama recruiting
News of the day

On a day coaches from both sides went to great lengths to compliment the opposing players, Clemson defensive coordinator Vic Koenning came out of left field with a shot at Alabama’s recruiting tactics.

Koenning, who has recruited southern Alabama for years, was asked a generic question about the Crimson Tide’s highly-touted freshman receiver Julio Jones.

“Julio? You know what, I actually ran into Julio in the spring recruiting,” Koenning said. “I said hello to him and said, ‘I guess I’ll be seeing you at the end of August.’ Then he got out and got in his Escalade and drove off. That’s (being) serious.

“And then I went over and watched (Alabama freshman) Burton Scott at Vigor High School at the track over there, and Burton Scott was running around. He went and got in his Escalade out at track practice and drove off. So I’m familiar with those two guys.”

After changing clothes, Koenning attempted to seek out reporters to ask if they were aware he was “kinda kidding around.”

Dumbass.

Anonymous said...

I believe a tounge is an old wooden ship used during the Civil War era. Don't worry, it's something us white folks who can't play football use. Don't worry about it.

Vic Koenning: HI, MY NAME IS SMART!

Anonymous said...

We will crush the spread on Thursday night! You guys will lose and then say, "well, at least we haven't lost an acc game yet". can't wait to get this season off to a wonderful start. i predict that mike davis and taylor rank combine for 200 yards on you a-holes in november. bring it!

Anonymous said...

.....Okay. Rank won't do much, but I think Davis will have a good number of yards, along side Maddox and Baker. Rank won't be much of a factor. I don't understand why Carolina would start him, but whatever. Either way, starting a RS freshman against a defense and hostile crowd like that on a Thursday night isn't going to be pretty for the Wolfpack.

In other news.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/football/ncaa/08/26/clemson.alabama.recruiting.ap/index.html?eref=si_ncaaf

Tell your precious Koenning to shutup. He's already dug himself a deep grave as it is because him and Bowden have a solid talent of saying stupid shit. Clemson coaches should honestly win a prize. Whose next? Napier? Sweeney?

Unknown said...

swing and a miss on your last name, Lou.